CORPUS CHRISTI, Tx — The United States is made up of many people who have migrated for different reasons. Some come for work, education, and others come seeking refuge. But Marife Darnell, a Filipino-American came here for love.
There’s a stereotype about Asians marrying Americans for a green card but she said she came here to be married.
“I don't really believe in love at first sight, it has to be planted and nurtured to grow,” Darnell said.
It took the couple more than a decade to marry and move to the U.S.
It began in 1999 when John visited the Philippines. He was there to honor his father, a prisoner of war in that country. She said his best friend was her aunt's husband and that is how they met.
They became friends while on his trip but John came back to the States to care for his sick parents. While he was away Marife said they still communicated.
"When he returned home there was a brief communication here and there, you know writing letters like in the old days, calling on the phone on weekends and then suddenly it shut off," she said.
11 years later, the two reconnected. John wanted to return to the island to search for Marife and her son Jed, his intentions surprised her.
"Oh wow what’s going on? I got that feeling that there must be something because you just don’t come back for nothing," she said.
He definitely came back for something—her heart.
But it took them five years and three proposals later to finally tie the knot.
During this period John was able to establish respect and love for her son, Jed Fesarite. That was very important to Marife.
The new family ended up moving to the U.S. together, as it was the best decision they could make for John’s health.
She said his kidney failed in December of 2022 and then they started dialysis. But before that he was already using inhalers because he has COPD emphysema.
But their commitment transcended mere words, embodying the essence of the vows they exchanged. In sickness and in health— the two became one.
Jed said John influenced him a lot.
John's love and dedication to his family inspire Jed to become the man he is today. He also served in the Marine Corps.
"We have taken him to the ER a lot and it never gets easier. We never get used to it," Jed said.
Jed said when he first met John he was only four-years-old and then when he came the second time around he was already a teenager.
Marife said that it was challenging to have a relationship because her son was already a teen.
"I was a bit rebellious, and wanted to protect my mom," Jed said.
But John didn't give up he put time and dedication into the relationship between Jed and him. He joked that he was trying to win him over instead of his mom.
"I'm happy that he came into our lives because not only did he bring happiness to my mom but also to me and now I got a dad," Jed said.
Marife is currently taking care of John as his health has rapidly decreased during the last 6six months. She said he is her priority.
The multicultural family values strength and kindness. Marife and John have been married for eight years and said they even smile through the hard times.
